But you're still the same

You know it's kinda weird to see someone you know you were going to ask out in the near future and you just lose feelings for them in a snap. It's like the lights turn on and you see that the room's been empty and everything you've assumed inside wasn't there after all. It's hard to explain.

Part of me thinks I'm fickle and I've just grown accustomed to that feeling of temporary infatuation. Then you realize it doesn't matter and you don't matter to them and it was all just overthinking in your head. You're back to square one with one less person you had feelings for.

Lately, I've been too focused on nothing, if that makes sense. I really, really wanted to see if things go right with this lady. I really wanted to take a chance and see where it goes.

I Don't Know Why I'm No One

Sometimes, when I feel sad about someone or I overthink, I just immediately think, "It doesn't matter." Not that the person I'm infatuated with doesn't matter or the thoughts don't matter; it's just me telling myself that what I feel doesn't matter and it's a great way of coping for myself.

Never said it was healthy but goddamn, it's so justified. It's a great way to just dismiss the matter because it really isn't important for anyone else other than me. So does it matter? No. It doesn't matter and I get to live with that.

It's my head singing "I'm done with you, I'm ignoring you. I don't wanna know."